How Hiding Your Gifts Holds Back Your Business and Your Life
Last week during High Achievers, I asked everyone to pick someone in the group and share something that was obvious to them but maybe not obvious to the person receiving it.
Jorden, who was literally High Achiever #1 and has become one of my closest friends over the last 3 years, picked me.
He said:
"Paul, you put so much focus on us as a group, which is good, but you've had a lot of successes and challenges over the last year and I'd like to hear more from you. I'd like to hear more about your growth."
I appreciated the feedback and responded honestly.
I told him that I have intentionally made it a point not to talk much about myself or my successes. While I understand the marketing side of self-promotion, I've always been turned off by people who constantly tell everyone how great their life is or how dramatic their struggles are, especially if they're the person leading the room.
I also shared that one of the things that makes me most uncomfortable is receiving praise in a group setting.
In a one-on-one conversation, I'm fine.
Publicly, I tend to deflect it, minimize it, or move on as quickly as possible.
I've thought about that conversation almost every day since.
The Memory I Hadn't Thought About in 20 Years
As I reflected on it, I remembered something I hadn't thought about in at least 20 years.
When I was a kid, I loved being the center of attention. I was an only child and had no problem celebrating, being excited, sharing wins, or taking up space.
Then somewhere along the way, a close family member made it very clear that I shouldn't.
I don't remember the exact words.
I don't remember the exact moment.
But I remember the feeling.
I remember learning that being too excited, too visible, or too proud of myself wasn't acceptable.
What surprised me wasn't the memory itself.
It was realizing how many years it had been influencing me.
As I reflected on it, I started seeing evidence everywhere:
Accomplish something meaningful? Downplay it.
Receive a compliment? Deflect it.
Hit a goal? Move on to the next one.
I realized I wasn't just holding back my accomplishments.
I was holding back my happiness.
Some of the biggest moments of my life were immediately minimized because somewhere deep down I had learned that being proud of myself wasn't something I was supposed to do.
The Cost of Staying Small
The problem isn't that it makes me uncomfortable.
The problem is that discomfort has consequences.
The first consequence is that it limits me.
If I genuinely believe I can help founders grow their businesses, create more freedom, become better leaders, and build lives they actually want, then I have a responsibility to talk about that impact clearly.
Not arrogantly.
Not dishonestly.
Clearly.
If I refuse to do that because it makes me uncomfortable, my business will never become what it's capable of becoming.
The second consequence is even more important.
My unwillingness to be uncomfortable may be holding back other people and their growth.
That realization hit me hard.
Over the last few years, I've watched people make decisions that completely changed the trajectory of their businesses and lives.
Some of those results happened because of rooms we've built together.
Some happened because of conversations I had the privilege of leading.
Either way, the impact is real.
Pretending otherwise doesn't serve anyone.
The Evidence Is Hard to Ignore
Here are just a handful of examples:
Scott added more than $300,000 in revenue to his business.
Reuben went all in on his real estate company and now owns more than 100 units.
Jorden launched a second business with his fiancée and added a third revenue stream.
Zak built a second passion-driven revenue stream and made a life-changing move.
David is on track to triple his business.
Robert completely rethought his strategy and is on pace to double revenue.
Nick is on track to triple his business and may grow 5–7x in 2027.
Olena added a new revenue stream that requires virtually no additional time.
Jen landed the biggest client in her company's history.
Normally, this is where I would hedge and tell you all the credit belongs to them.
To be clear, these are exceptional people.
They've done the work.
They've taken the risks.
They've made the decisions.
They deserve tremendous credit.
But for the first time in my professional life, I'm willing to say something that makes me uncomfortable:
I was a direct contributor to many of those outcomes, and many of them would not have happened without me.
I don't say that because it makes me look good.
I say it because I've finally found something I believe I am uniquely gifted at doing.
My Zone of Genius
I can often see greatness in people before they see it in themselves.
I can see where they're playing smaller than they need to.
I can see the decisions they're avoiding.
I can see the stories they're telling themselves that no longer serve them.
I can connect people who need to know each other.
I can ask questions that uncover truths they've been avoiding.
I can create environments where growth becomes almost inevitable.
What started as 7 guys meeting together has become a community of more than 30 entrepreneurs across multiple mastermind groups, along with a growing women's mastermind that exists because there was a need and I decided to act.
Jorden's feedback made me realize something important:
Staying quiet about that isn't humility.
It's avoidance.
What About You?
If sharing my gifts helps someone else discover theirs, then hiding them serves nobody, including me.
So let me ask you a question:
How do you handle public praise and attention?
Are you holding back your zone of genius because it feels uncomfortable?
Because it feels arrogant?
Because somewhere along the way you learned that being seen wasn't safe?
Maybe you're not ready to share it with a large audience yet.
That's okay.
Start with me.
Tell me what you're exceptionally good at.
Tell me about the value you create.
Tell me about the thing that comes naturally to you but seems difficult for everyone else.
Tell me about your zone of genius as if your life, business, and happiness depend on it.
Because they probably do.